Life

Lately I've been thinking about life. (Do I say that a lot?)

As I prepare for some major (at least for me) changes in my life this summer, I can't help but begin to have yet another paradigm shift - you know, those major shifts in perspective that can happen from time to time...those experiences that shape and redefine your perspective in such a way that suddenly you have a completely new way of thinking about things. I like to think of it as maturing. Like MAYBE eventually one day when I'm in my 90's, I'll finally have things figured out. But probably not. In fact, sometimes I feel like I have to have THE SAME paradigm shifts over and over again as reminders. But, oh well!

Anyway, here are a few of the things I have been thinking about:

Last Thursday our church had a Relief Society (women's organization) activity that focused on celebrating the creation of the Relief Society back in 1842. As part of the activity, several women shared pioneer stories. One of the stories that was shared was about a young family of four that traveled from Wales to Utah to join the Saints. The family in the story even had two children, aged 6 months and 2 years. I couldn't help but relate to this family as I sometimes think of myself as a "reverse pioneer" in a sense - giving up my extended family, home, comforts, and possessions to move across the ocean, back to the land of MY ancestors.

As the family headed out west, they ended up on a steam ship sailing down one of the rivers in America. Apparently steam ships were extremely dangerous and this particular steam ship had a difficult time navigating a bend in the river. After several days of trying without luck (and many passengers complaining about the delays), the captain gave the order to put the fire in the furnaces as high as it would go - they even threw bacon into the fire to make it hotter. The intention was that this would give the ship enough power to navigate the turn. Instead, the ship exploded, killing most of the people on board. The mother of the family was the only one that survived. She lost her husband and her two young children. She was badly burned and disfigured for the rest of her life. And yet, she continued her trek to Utah to join the Saints and continued in her faith in God.

As I heard this story, especially since I had the nerve to compare myself to the pioneers, I thought about how often we don't realize how good we have it. It is SO easy to focus on our difficulties, on what we lack, or on our trials and to completely forget the innumerable blessings we enjoy. I once went through a phase when I was in college where I even felt blessed to have CARPET! And really, carpet is a blessing, but an example of one that is easily overlooked!

As I have been considering my move abroad, I keep thinking about what I will be giving up. I think about the savings that could go toward another house down payment, which will likely be used up, at least partially, in the move. I think of my belongings that I will need to sort through and get rid of. I think of my many comforts and possessions that will not be moving abroad with us. Because of this, I have considered myself to be like the pioneers. They also had to leave a lot of their belongings behind to move west. But another story that was shared that night mentioned the hurried flight the Saints made from Nauvoo to flee the mobs. Those pioneers didn't have the advanced notice that I have.

As I considered what the pioneers actually went through, I felt like I couldn't even compare myself to them. They didn't have months of preparation to determine which items to take and which to leave behind. Some were forced to leave in a hurry, with little more than their families. They didn't have the option of purchasing more belongings (even meager ones) when they arrived. Many of them were pregnant, but still journeyed through those harsh conditions - often giving birth on the plains and sometimes even burying family members as they travelled. They were heading out to the open wilderness, with only faith to guide their footsteps. They weren't leaving family, knowing that they could send an instant email any time they wanted or web chat from across the ocean. They left, not knowing if they would EVER see each other again in this life.

It leaves me in awe of these great men and women. It also makes my situation feel almost trivial in comparison.

The other thing I have been thinking about, as I have researched differences between the US and the UK, is how different life is over there. Not that it is COMPLETELY different, but there will be some definite adjustments. For example, since we will be living near London, life will be significantly more expensive. In addition, housing is significantly smaller there. From what I have read, anything 1,000 square feet or over is considered spacious. Closets are rare. Fridges are smaller than in the US. Access to cheap goods (like Wal-Mart or Target) is difficult to find. The washers are different, the heating is different, plumbing is different.

In some ways it is a struggle for me to think about adjusting to the differences. I know I'll miss many of the comforts that I have come to enjoy and consider "ordinary." But I DO think it will be a good experience. I think I sometimes get caught up in what "living" is, based on my own experiences and expectations. But much of the world lives differently than me. And you know what, we can live happy and full lives with MUCH LESS than we have right now.

As I've sorted through so many of my possessions just getting ready to put our house on the market, I've started to realize just how much STUFF I own, but NEVER use. Even now that our house is cleaned out, there are still many items that we don't use on a regular basis or that I'm confident we don't really need. And sure, some things are nice to have, but life can be just as enjoyable without them. Sometimes maybe even more so.